its about the gist of the message

Maybe not literally the same situation, but the gist of the message is there, especially @ the end. If you still troll my blog.. Read this all the way through.. You know who you are:


“Tonight I listened to a voicemail you left me three months ago. 
In it, you told me to go fuck myself. 
I still remember that night.
I still remember those words rolling off your tongue so gracefully. 
I remember wondering how someone so beautiful could be so cruel.

Two months ago I called you at three A.M. 
I expected you to ignore it, or to send me to voicemail;
those were two of the things you were best at. 
You answered and I felt my heart begin to race; 
you probably thought it was because I missed you, 
but truthfully it was because I didn’t expect you to answer. 
I asked you how you were and you sat there quietly and confused. 
It was like you forgot that I existed and that I was once a part of your life.
You told me “fine” and I smiled.
That was the last conversation we had. 
I made sure to let go of you, and every negative word that was said, in a peaceful way.

Fast forward two months, and I still wonder how you are. 
I still wonder how your cat is and if you’ve seen any good movies lately. 
If you ever heard me say this, you’d probably blush like you used to whenever I said something sweet. 
You’d probably think I think these things because I still love you, that I still want you.
 But that is not the case.
You see, six months ago I was jumping through hoops to please you.
To make sure that you were happy before myself.
To make sure that I was the one causing your happiness.

But it is not six months ago. 
It is now.
 And now I simply remember you as a person I gave my soul to. 
A person I told secrets to at 4am and messed around with to feel a sense of closeness. 
A person I loved, yes. 
But it is not six months ago. 
It is now, and now I miss you. 
I miss the way you called randomly just to ask how my day was. 
I miss the way you seemed to care, even if you didn’t. 
I miss the friendship and the secrets and the stories. 
And maybe one day things will be different. 
Maybe you’ll call me on a Tuesday afternoon and ask how my day was.

These are the things I think about before my eyes slowly close and I am finally rewarded with sleep.
 But for right now? 
Go fuck yourself. Seriously”

(via skinandb0neslove)

Hashtag: alittlehonesty

Wouldnt it be nice to have a GF/significant other that had the gumption to actually feel this way?

“I want you and I don’t want to be a luxury. I want you to need me. I want you to not be able to concentrate because you’re thinking about me. I want you to reach for your phone because you thought of something you have to share with me. I want you to not even be able to breathe at the thought of never seeing me again, because that’s how I feel about you.”

Just sayin

australia or new zealand..hmmm

just a side bar note… after looking around.. turns out that maybe i need to take my own advise and launch a dart of my own.. turns out that australia and new zealand are in need of men and that US men are on the top of the desired list… hmmmmm, i wonder… im college educated, medical professional, obviously a horrible writer, i have a sense of humor and an equally large sense of adventure…

ask box is open..

a response to “collide with me”

my response to an awesome poem that can be read at

you guys should check out her posts… pretty awesome reads.


“ill catch you”



i see you over the horizon

coming at me like

hell on wheels,

why you want to fall into me

confuses me still


i see your scars

and babe i have them


dont crash into me

i dont want to be the

one that ends up

hurting you


i dont want social perfection

i dont want blonde and blue

i just want a kindred spirit

real and true

i dont want golden skin

and legs for miles

those are superficial and

so not me

if you read my poetry

this youd see


we are both misunderstood

dark things

overlooked by people that live

in the light

i dont care about your

dark hair, dark eyes

or skin that is covered

in scars and milky white

i just want a kindred spirit

real and true

i would like to know i have

a friend to rely on

a friend like you


dont worry about saving me

there isnt much left to be


she took the fire from me,

and burned my heart with

it… sent it to its grave


i see you coming fast over

the horizon,

like hell on wheels..

come on then,

crash into me,

ill save you instead..

you still have a chance to feel.

Hashtag: ibelieved

I believed
Like i tend to foolishly do
That you felt the same
That i felt for you

I believed every word
Youd say
I believed the passion
In our stolen
Every day

I believed.. All your fuckin
I dont regret
The moment
That you broke my heart
And left me out
To dry

I just hope
That as you walk away
As my blood
Runs cold
You hear me say…

I believed.

Heres the razor
Come on beth, cut me again
Because i believed
You loved me more
Than him

Heres the fucking knife
Straight from my heart
Stab me again
Till its torn apart

They say that trust
Should not be broken
They must be right
Cause now i dont believe
The words youve fuckin spoken

I just hope
As you walk away
As my blood
runs cold
You hear me say…

I believed….